Midlife Challenge- Enjoy Your Time
Current situation.. Relaxing by the lake while Craig fishes on his kayak. I am one happy girl!
If we didn’t have to work for a living, I think we would do nothing but travel and make this our daily goal. Retirement is still beyond the horizon, many moons to go before we experience permanent fishing life.
As he becomes a speck on the lake, I sit here in my reclining lounge chair listening to the sound of birds, frogs, and even fish splashing at me. These little guys were staring at me from their shallow water, so I threw in some food, now they are beggars. I did not know fish worked this way, sneaky things!
Back home my youngest son is probably still sleeping. I texted him last night to check on the dogs and he was barbequing hamburgers. I think this may be the first time he cooked for himself and friends. I was impressed! Something about that made me consider this strange time and place, the ‘in between’.
It took a few years, but I slowly made my way through rough seas. There was a time this phase in life frightened me. The transition in my roll as a mother overwhelmed me. I didn’t know how to walk from one place to the next. There were tears and shouts of joy simultaneously. It was confusing and unknown. But time pushed on and pushed me through. I asked for help in prayer more than any other time in my life. God managed to deal with my emotional outbursts better than people around me.
Days like this calm my soul. Sitting here for a brief moment reminds me that I made it through. I never like to say I deserve anything, but man, I deserve this break. I have dealt with my share when it comes to kids, and now adult children. The valleys have been low and long.
As my son made his way to 18, I thought it was all coming to an end. As though my status as mom would be revoked and I had to apply for a new one. The three years since then have proven nothing ended. I actually await the time when all kids are settled and I no longer have these particular sets of worry. I now know, worry in parenting never ends, it merely evolves.
I think I will wrap this up. A bigger fish just egged me on to try, just try to catch him. I am no fisherman, but I never back down to a challenge. You have to enjoy life, and right now, I am.
(Forgot my laptop, using my phone, hope I caught autocorrect making it’s mistakes)