Quiet the Chaos, Honor Your Story
Life, reflection, and aging. If mid-life is here, what I am in it?
When I started this blog series, I was completely convinced that my daily routine would change to something unrecognizable because my mother duties would drastically evolve into the unfamiliar. Today, I am keenly aware that nothing has really changed at all.
We know our brain is sending all the wrong signals. We seek help from one place or the other. We pull away because it seems no one understands or cares to understand. Then we reach out again, and if we are lucky, one person may understand.
While I was busy managing life all around me, the life inside of me was just laying on some couch, eating Doritos, staring aimlessly at the show I was living on the outside.
Hope is that last thread by which we dangle over the pit of uncertainty. Hope sees you through to tomorrow. Hope lifts the falling spirit of a broken soul. Hope rescued me.
The years pass like a speeding money train on route to an important destination. If I blink, I may miss it. I can stay parked on the couch pouting, frustrated and invite Stress to linger. On the other hand, with confidence and faith, I can respectfully decline the invite to mope-ville, and prepare for the days ahead.
I knew this time was coming, I have written about it for a couple years now. As a mother who was so deeply involved there has been grief for losing the woman and mother I was once.
Many things were obvious- this group of believers lives for Jesus, this group of believers trusts in His healing power, this group of believers are not ashamed, or embarrassed to worship the Lord, loudly, quietly, together or alone (just like me)..There was a sense of being home in their presence, while home in the Lord.
We have spent so much time taking a million pictures to be able to post just one perfect view, that we have forgotten all the other frames we left behind. We cleverly show family photos where even the clothes match- I don’t know one family that leaves their house dressed identical, EVER.
Every day I woke up, I chose to smile again, to feel again, and to love again. When the moments were too hard to bare, I ran forward and jumped into His arm, and when facing God in my broken mental state was too difficult, I simply let go, and fell back without sight, and without fear, and gently placed myself in his loving hands.
I will wake up, I will forget things, and I will probably get lost in the parking lot. I feel somewhat lost on the inside most days, anyhow. A part of me appears to be quietly slipping away. I do not always recognize myself with the many changes taking place.
Reflections from the Threshold of Reason and Feeling
A place where I post unscripted, unedited, soulless rants of a insomniac madman
Code with Smooth Strokes
Retro Gaming, Positive Fatherhood, Proudly South African
Quiet the Chaos, Honor Your Story
My experiences in regards to travel and everything in between.
Humanity is excitedly reaching out 🌍 to embrace new times! 🎉
| Just Me Traversing Through the Wilderness of an Everyday Mess and Finding Beauty From Ashes and a Little Grace Along the Way |
Reflections on Life through poetry, essays and photos
Lisa @ Authentic Truths 