January 7- “I cannot see truth when I focus on interpreting lies.”
Curious about this challenge, I am taking part and designing it as I go. May God lead me in an entire year to keep the word ‘Awaken’ on my mind and heart and to see His glory throughout all lessons learned.
One week ago, I decided to embrace a word to guide me through 2022. I asked God, “What works for you?” and just like that, ‘Awaken’ was it.
And since January 1, life moved in a way that released a year of doubts and living in shadows, to awareness and light. I have felt that simple word to the depths of my being. I wake up each day and wonder what my great Comforter will reveal. I believe God knew that things would change on December 31, 2021. He prepared me for a new year, a new beginning filled with unique insight into who I am, and I strive to become. I watch helplessly as a loved one fights addiction. Mentally pulled into the struggle, I fought to keep God in his place.
After a decade, I have awakened to the true meaning of letting go and allowing God to work. He shows my loved one his tender mercy daily, wrapping her safety in the deadliest scenarios. It is evident to everyone but her. He loves us with a powerful love that seems foreign and unattainable. Yet, there she is-alive and healing.
Here I am, stunned and amazed. God has her, and he has me.
So, after one week, I can report one blindfold is gone. I see that in letting go, I am free. Free to love my daughter right where she is without expectation. I have opened my eyes to see His glory in a situation built on worldly darkness, fear, and pain. I release the part of me that held on to some odd hope of fixing the problem. I also remove the need to hold on to an end in sight. I pray it happens every day. I refuse to beat myself up when things fall apart again.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”.. (Jeremiah 29:11)
I know God is working to tell me something, show me His purpose and plan, and prosper my life. I could not see that before. Lost in another’s darkness, I couldn’t find my way. That is what ‘Awaken’ will be in this year- to find my way into the light meant for me.