I have a fb acquaintance/friend who had to fly to Colorado this week to collect her sons remains. He died of an overdose.
She was one of ten who shared this news over the last two weeks.
Her son had been living his recovery for over four years. Years that weren’t perfect, but they were the best according to her. He had managed to overcome some of the addiction patterns of his younger days. Reconciliation had been reached where war once ripped family seams. His loved ones learned to love him where he was, a problem in most families with addiction issues.
For many families, we eventually see signs way ahead of the bump in the road. We know the behavior patterns well, and find it near impossible to live outside of the detective, counselor, advocate, worried parent role we’ve become. Even the parents who endure tough love live in that zone.
My heart physically hurt when the news was shared. This friend is a strong advocate within the community. When you thought of success, you thought of their situation.
It was a dark reminder of the realities of substance use. This can and does happen to people who are in their recovery for days, weeks, months, and even years. It happens to the quiet and withdrawn, it happens to the loud and engaged.
I do not have answers to combat relapse. I only have the reality I’ve seen. Part of the problem is the acceptance being stronger than standing against it.
“Relapse is part of recovery.”
It is like manifesting your personal failure. Walking onto a job and saying, “I know I’ll screw up and get fired.” While statistics show a high level of relapse occurs during recovery, no one should verbalize it into existence. Know yourself, your triggers, and set boundaries to help cope and deal with life as it arises.
Fight For You.
The words ‘working a program’ don’t always sit well with people. So call it your recovery plan, your living agenda, your addiction success manifesto, or your SURVIVAL plan!
Call it what you want, but without dealing with the root causes of addiction, mental wellness decline, and carving your path forward, you will not surrender and release those old behaviors. Minds in addiction are broken and need fixed. Minds in depression, bipolar, anxiety are no different!
If you want relief and healing, do the work to achieve it. The failure to change thought patterns, which can evolve feelings and reactions or choices, leads to self-destruction over and over again. You have programmed your mind in unhealthy habits, it’s time to correct it.
Can Faith Help?
I am praying that you (parents included) know that living in addiction is one place you can stand up and walk right out from. It may seem impossible, it’s not. But it is work, commitment, surrender, confession, acceptance, acknowledgment, forgiveness, and strength all wrapped in one.
You do have that power inside of you, it was there from the beginning. It never leaves you or abandons you. It supplies what others never can. It listens when others are tired of the stories. It comforts when those who hurt need distance. It comes with a promise of mercy, and peace. You don’t have to search for answers, it is there to give them to you.
‘It’ has a name. Jesus.
Always here if you need me,