Bipolar Life- The Journal #49 “Suicide”

It has to stop!


My heart aches to hear of not one, but three deaths this week. One was a father who walked in the restroom at his home and found the body of his young, teenage daughter. My heart aches for these devastated families reeling from the trauma.

Life can be challenging. Personally, stress is maxing out right now. Adult children in their mess is stressful. No matter my efforts to minimize, I feel it. My health is affected by this stress, and has been for a couple years.

I experience that deep longing to throw away life, but we can not entertain ending it. With bipolar, those thoughts creep in, and I have to fight. We all have to challenge our thinking. Life goes on. As misaligned as it may be today, tomorrow could be perfection, or better at least.

Suicide doesn’t end the pain, the mental war, the fear, or the sadness; it ends your breathing and your life and transfers your pain to someone else.

We do have the means to engage this war! Jesus gave us what we need. I looked a pawn of Satan in the eye and took my life back. So, I refuse to sit here and not help others know. I found the power to overcome, and so can you.

If we don’t take back our thoughts, then they will overpower. Mental illness exists, but I am a strong woman of faith. My faith is stronger than the feelings that erupt with fire. Living for Christ is more compelling than dying for nothing.

In life, I will experience trouble, but I am a daughter of the Most High, the King of Kings. And He overcame this world and its darkness through Jesus Christ. What Satan will use to entice, I fight. And I will keep on fighting.

If you need immediate help, please contact The National Suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255, go to your local emergency room, or contact a family member or friend.

You can fight for yourself, now is the time.

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