Bipolar Life-The Journal, #3

The best lesson of my life-

Nothing about my story is special. Not the pain of my past. Not the surviving I had to do. Not the suicidal thoughts I’ve lived with. Not one single health difficulty, physical or mental. Nothing about my life was ever a unique or special story.

Many people out there have suffered beyond my comprehension, worse than my worst. Many people in my same story have succeeded beyond my comprehension. Many people have never shared a word about what they lived through, they just lived valiantly and remarkably. They learned to love so freely.

The only thing unique about me is how I, individually, have responded to the hurts of the past to joyfully live through the pressures of today. Opening my heart to reflect love, the same love that was given to me. I am unique in how I chose to love myself beyond the shell I once was, and how I continued to love others unconditionally but with my own conditions- that I never give up and I never put anyone above my God.

Maybe my lesson is a lesson you need today. Maybe your pain is still holding you down, even to the point of wrapping itself around your throat and constricting every breath you take. Maybe you are so stuck in the midst of your anger and tragedy that YOU are the one strangling yourself, and you have never noticed.

You can’t move forward when you are sitting smack dab, making excuses, in your past. The past doesn’t move into your present or future with you. You choose to stay back there in the muck, covered in the filth and fire. Internally dying yet burning with a desire to leave, but never realizing all you have to do is stand up and walk away. Also known as, moving on.