Mental Illness, Addiction, Survival
We woke to crashing and movement of furniture. I quickly ran upstairs and listened at my daughters door. She was screaming, "Let me out of here!" With caution, I approached her door and began to turn the handle. It wasn't locked, I'm not even sure it has a lock. There was my daughter, on her knees, fighting the lockless handle, to escape her room.
When anxiety tramples your night.
They may not make it out alive. I already found my daughter unresponsive in a suicide attempt, so I am numb to the scenario, yet in fear. As a parent, you never want to accept your child might die, but I acknowledge this painful truth.
(It is #77) What the hell am I doing? I rarely cuss. I hate it, to be honest. If it leaves my mouth, my patience is fried. I may be there today. I watched a movie early this morning. A sappy love film. "How long have you been married? Do you really even know who …
Continue reading "Bipolar Life- The Journal # (I have no clue)"
Stepping into Done
Is this a meltdown of sorts? For the first time in my life, I am crying out to myself- not a doctor, not family, not even God. I am internally wailing at myself to wake up, to feel, to live. Yet, I have zero response in me.
Our hearts cry, and our blood looks the same.
For dead men are speaking, to the world from the grave.
There was relief
In the final sigh..
When surrender felt
Like breath of life..
I 'found' myself in Florida. That silly cliche never appealed to me until I could relate. I fell in love with my soul in the few years we were blessed to live there.
I don't choose to hide my truth in some closet in hopes of fooling anyone. I make no claims to owning the answers for mental health. I am not the authority on anything.
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Sun Rise to Son Set - Joy Peace Love - Thy Will Be Done
Saved by grace through faith!
